Global Warming (Half Man, Half Bear, Half Pig)

            Al Gore says, “The world faces a true planetary emergency.” He knows what’s going on!  He’s a modern day eco-messiah.  He travels all over the world in a private jet to warn us of global warming.  Why he even won an Oscar! Anyone who wins an Oscar must know what they’re talking about.  Just ask fellow Oscar winner Michael Moore.  If an Oscar isn’t enough to convince you, he was even awarded the Nobel Peace Prize!   
           The headlines seem to confer what Al is saying. In Africa drought continues for the 6th consecutive year. Record rains in parts of the U.S. and Japan cause some of the worst flooding in centuries. New England and Europe have recently experienced the mildest winters in anyone’s recollection.  Climate change is real and it’s all documented in Time Magazine. We have messed up the environment and now we have to pay for it. Scientists have told us that we're heading into a new… ice age?? Huh? Yes, you just read that correctly. TIME MAGAZINE SAYS WE’RE HEADED INTO AN ICE AGE. Check it out for yourself. Pick up the Monday June 24th issue from 1974. It’s the truth. About thirty years ago everyone thought we had messed up the earth with careless emissions of burnt fossil fuels. Today the same fossil emissions that caused global cooling in 1974 are causing global warming in 2009!

            John Coleman was the weatherman for Good Morning America during the 1970’s. He is best known though for being the founder of the Weather Channel and declaring that global warming is a scam.  Yes, the founder of the Weather Channel says that global warming is a scam! What? That can’t be right, after all Super Al is flying all over the place trying to save us from certain catastrophe!  It’s true that the earth is getting hotter.  As a matter of fact, the earth’s solar activity is at an 8,000 year high currently.  When you compare charts with solar activity and temperatures with those of Co2 emissions and temperatures, something really bizarre appears.  Let’s take a look at them below:

            Look at the chart with solar activity and you will see a very tight fit correlation with temperatures and solar activity.  However, when you look at the chart with Co2 emissions you see temperatures dramatically deceasing in times of rapid increasing Co2 emissions.  The Co2 chart looks bonkers compared to the solar activity temperatures.  Ladies and gentlemen, global warming is indeed a scam. THE SOLAR CYCLES ARE IN CONCERT WITH RISING AND FALLING TEMPERATURES. THE BURNING OF FOSSIL FUELS DOESN’T HAVE A THING TO DO WITH IT!

           John Charles is the president of the Cascade Institute. For 17 years he was the executive director of the Oregon Environmental Counsel.  He does not see the reason to demonize carbon.  “Carbon Dioxide is an essential element in the earth’s climate control system, and if we didn’t have it, it would be too cold for humanity to be here.”  What you would guess man’s percentage of total annual Co2 emissions is? 90%? 70%? If that’s what you’re thinking (and I admit before I was enlightened I probably though somewhere around there) you are way way way off.  Per year, the percentage of Co2 emissions from man only accounts for 3% of total Co2 emissions! 97% of all Co2 emissions from around the world come from natural sources. The biggest culprits of Co2 emissions are decaying plants, volcanoes, and forest fires. Humans shouldn’t be protesting other humans.  They should start protesting dying plants and volcanoes.  They are the real earth killers!  Why we should pass a cap and trade tax on volcanoes.  Sorry Hawaii, you’re going to have to invest in volcanic Co2 emissions reducing technology or face some heavy taxes that we will give over to Al Gore in carbon credits.  Super Al to the rescue!

Super Al to the Rescue!

In 2006, public records were legally released detailing Al Gore’s electrical usage.  It turns out Al Gore uses 20x the amount of electricity than an average American uses. Say it aint so Al! L Al Gore, the greatest environmental hero, is an energy hog. In 2006 AL Gore’s 20 room mansion used over 191,000 kilowatts compared to 11,000 kilowatts of the average American home. Every month Al Gore uses more electrify than the average person uses in 17 months. So he’s obviously not as worried as he says we should be. Gore’s people didn’t deny the repost and insisted he was in the process of installing solar panels and that recently he had replaced some of his incandescent bulbs with some florescent ones. What a martyr!! He also buys carbon credits but he owns the company he buys them from. Gore pays himself to make up the damage he’s admitted he does to the environment. Al Gore started the private company in 2004, 2 years before his movie came out. So Al Gore makes money through his company when people buy carbon credits. For environmentalists, the environment is a religion and Al Gore is a prophet. In  exposing Al Gore’s home energy bills we have attacked their prophet. For some of the poorest people on the planet our being green can affect their survival. How? Al Gore and his green followers are trying to pass new regulations in carbon taxes that will end up raising the global cost of fuel. Fuel the world’s poor need to cook or pump water. Fuel to get their goods to market or their kids to school or to a doctor. “When you talk about raising the price of energy to them, you are going to kill people. Just like the environmentally induced ban of DDT resulted in 10’s of millions of death.